What does ENERGY mean to you?
Today is my blog day, and I have a long list of subjects that I am excited to write about, discuss with you, share with someone! From time to time I write about the subjects on my website. After all, that is what I am passionate about. But those blogs end up being very factual and not really a blog I would read myself! So instead, I am choosing to write from my heart and see where it leads to…. The question I ask myself? What is present for me right now?
Well, I am on the recovery road from a Mega Cold and what freaks me most when I am not on form is the feeling of no energy! When I reflect over my life, this has been an issue for many years. I have always been on the search for more energy, so I can do more, be more, expect more, live more…… This obsession with wanting more energy has given me some wonderful adventures for many many years. Until the day came, when I simply ran out! There was no food or beverage or activity or exercise or prestige or sleep or movie that could trigger the energy kick I had been accustomed to live from.
After the initial shock, came denial; this doesn´t happen to me! Then came, anxiety; who am I with out “my” special energy? Then came depression; a big empty whole in the centre of my being…..
So I just kept breathing. In and out. Day and night. Until gradually I breathed so deep, the oxygen must have touched a small flicker of light deep in my heart and I started to feel alive again. Enough to ask for help. And that was the beginning of a complete new understanding of all the different forms of energy together with a deeper awareness of my own personal responsibility to choose with discernment how I use my energy.
Today’s energy quota is partly going to my doggie, taking a walk in the woods; partly to you reading this blog; partly to my family as we support my parents at a time of old age and illness; partly to my home, cooking for my husband; partly to my yoga mat to connect mind intelligence to body intelligence and a 5 minute dance around to shake off all that does not serve me any more!